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홍차넷
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티타임
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- 다양한 주제에 대해 자유롭게 글을 작성하는 게시판입니다.
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전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌방송/연예도서/문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제생활체육과학/기술철학/종교정치요리/음식역사여행육아/가정IT/컴퓨터음악창작게임스포츠사회오프모임
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 18/07/21 23:48:18 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 수정됨 |
| Name | 알료사 |
| File #1 | IMG_20180721_233704.png (83.2 KB), Download : 7 |
| Subject | 눈물하구 기적 |
 저는 직업적인 일이든 개인적인 일이든 그것을 처리할 때 상대방의 태도와 자세를 많이 봅니다. 타 부서 직원이든, 고객이든, 친구든 선후배든간에요. 내가 이런저런 사정이 있는데 어떻게 좀 안되겠습니까 부탁드리겠습니다, 하고 간곡히 말하는 사람에게는 안되는 일이라도 좀 무리를 해서 방법을 찾아보고 어떤 식으로든 강행하는 스타일이에요. 그것이 편법이거나 심지어는 사소한 위법의 여지까지 있더라도. 그래서 최악의 경우 제가 책임을 지더라도. 반면에, 분명 쉽게 이야기할 성격의 일이 아닌데도 나는 당신에게 이것을 요구할 권리가 있다, 너는 냉큼 이것을 준비해 내게 대령하라, 하고 나오는 사람에게는, 그 권리의 애매한 경계에 걸쳐 있는 부분에 대해서라면 매우 까칠하게 굽니다. 경계에서 바깥쪽에 가까우면 제가 짤리지 않는 선에서 최대한 상대방을 기분 나쁘게 왜 당신은 그것을 내게 요구할 수 없는지 쏘아대고, 경계에서 안쪽에 가까우면 최종적으로는 그 요구를 들어주더라도 제가 걸 수 있는 딴지란 딴지는 모조리 다 걸어버린 이후에 아무튼 상대에게 거머리가 달라붙은 듯한 찝찝한 기분이 들도록 만들어 줍니다. 이게 우스운게, 이렇게 못돼 처먹은 저인데도 까칠함을 시전하고 있는 도중에 상대방의 자세가 바뀌는 경우가 있어요. 아 이새기 또라이구나 건드리면 안되겠구나 하고 수그러드는 사람들인데, 그렇게 물러서는 사람들에게는 제가 또 아량을 베풉니다. 그거 안되는건데, 내가 특별히 힘써 볼께(딱히 힘든일 아님), 하는 식으로요. 그러면 그 처음의 안하무인이었던 사람은 온데간데없이 아이고 고마워요 알료사씨 하고 넙죽거려요. 이렇다니까요. 못되게 굴수록 착한 사람 이미지 얻기 더 쉬워요. 그니깐 호구로 살면 안됨ㅋ 음.. 꼭 저의 대인관계에 있어서만이 아니라.. 저는 [권리]라는 것을 당연하게 생각하는걸 개인적으로 별로 안좋아해요. 실제로 그것이 정당한 권리라 할지라도요. 이 세상에서 우리가 향유하는 모든 물질적이고 정신적인 가치 중에서 그것이 당연히 우리 권리인 것은 하나도 없다고 생각해요. 디폴트는 지옥이고, 평범한 삶은 신(혹은 과학적인 자연의 원리)의 관대한 선물이라고 여기는 식이죠. 공기가 있어 숨 쉴 수 있는 것, 맛없는 음식이라도 끼니를 때울 수 있는 것, 사랑하는 사람을 불행한 사고로 떠나보내더라도 이 짧은 생 안에 그 사람과 함께할 수 있었던 시간이 잠시나마 존재했다는 것.. 등등요. 그래서 맥락은 다르지만 나의아저씨 박동훈이 <현실이 지옥이야. 벌 다 받고 가면 되겠지>라고 말한 것에도 크게 공감이 되었어요. 그리고 그 벌을 받는 과정에서, 제가 어떤 고통이라도 감내하겠습니다, 다만 한가지 이것만은 간절히 바라나이다, 하는 절박함에는 지상의 인간으로서는 이해할 수 없는 형태의 보상이 주어지리라는 상당히 미신적인 믿음도 가지고 있구요. 신(혹은 과학적 원리)도 저처럼 못돼 처먹은 또라이라서 원리원칙 없이 인간이 하는거 봐서 인자하게 굴기도, 까칠하게 굴기도 할거라고. 시크릿이라는 책이 약을 거하게 팔아 인기와 떼돈을 벌어 많은 사람들의 비웃음을 사고 있잖아요, 저는 시크릿의 그 원리 완전히 무시하지는 않습니다. 참 지독히도 안풀렸던 삼십몇년간의 제 꼬인 인생이었지만.. 그리고 제가 원하는 바람들 중에 이루어진건 손에 꼽을 정도지만.. (더구나 결정적인 것들은 빼놓고) 그런데도 제가 어떤 비정한 운명 같은 거에 철저하게 외면만 당하고 있는거 같지는 않아요. 사실 지금 이 얘기 유게에 사람 울리는 만화 보고나서 눈물 쏙 빼고 하고있는건데요..ㅋ 저도 가끔 그런 생각 했었거든요. 제가 흘린 눈물로 무언가가 만들어져서 그것이 내 안 구석 어디선가 나를 지탱해주고 작은 기적들을 일으켜 주고 있는건 아닌가 하는. 말이 안되는 얘기긴 한데 ㅋ 그냥 느낌상의 느낌이에요. 이런 생각을 한다는거 자체가 제가 운이 좋은 사람이라는 증거 같아요. 결정적인 위기들을 몇번 넘어선 순간들마다, 당시에는 내가 잘나서 해냈다고 생각했는데.. 돌아보면 돌아볼수록 그거 다 엄청난 운빨이던거 같거든요.. 거의 기적에 가까운. 만약에 그 운이 없었다면 저는 지금 이 세상에 없거나 지금보다 훨씬 염세적인 사람이 되어 있었겠죠. ... 얼마전에 지인으로부터 넌 현실감각좀 찾아야 할 필요가 있다는 팩폭을 당했는데 쉽게 고쳐질 병이 아닌거 같네요 ㅋ ... 음. 혼란하다 혼란해 ㅋㅋ 이걸 어떻게 마무리짓지.. 좋아하는 카라마조프의 형제들 문장 하나 던지고 끝내겠습니다 ㅋ 기적은 리얼리스트를 혼란스럽게 하지 않고, 리얼리스트를 믿음으로 이끄는 것은 기적이 아니며 진정한 리얼리스트는 기적마저 믿지 않을 자신의 힘과 능력을 언제라도 발견하겠지만, 반면에 기적이 자기 앞에서 물리칠 수 없는 사실로 굳어진다면 그는 다름 아닌 자신의 리얼리즘에 따라 기적도 반드시 인정해야 한다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 8 |
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Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 599
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 599
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 614
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 616
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 620
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 640
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 644
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/cmt_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 6
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 22
Warning: Use of undefined constant file_name - assumed 'file_name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 28
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 65
109670 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
109670 class='vcm '>
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 70
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
109670'> 린
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
18/07/22 05:18
109670>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
평소 같았으면 그냥 우와 정말 유려하다하고 멀찍이 서서 엿보았을 테지만, 개인사의 부침과 새벽감성의 힘을 빌어 뭐라도 끄적이고 싶어 조심스레 괜한 댓글을 달아봅니다. 좋은 글에 때가 묻지 않았으면 좋겠어요.
지엽적이지만, 인상적이고 뭐라도 적어보고 싶었던 것은 권리에 대한 생각인데요. 저는 단순히 문장상의 의미로, 우리가 누리는 소위 권리라는 것이 숨쉬듯 당연하고, 현실에 고스란히 실체화되고 표창되어 있다는 것이 누구나 절절하게 깨달을 지경이길 바라요. 종국에는 권리 위에 잠자는 누구더라도 빼먹고 사회라는 버스에서 모르고 두고 내... 더 보기
지엽적이지만, 인상적이고 뭐라도 적어보고 싶었던 것은 권리에 대한 생각인데요. 저는 단순히 문장상의 의미로, 우리가 누리는 소위 권리라는 것이 숨쉬듯 당연하고, 현실에 고스란히 실체화되고 표창되어 있다는 것이 누구나 절절하게 깨달을 지경이길 바라요. 종국에는 권리 위에 잠자는 누구더라도 빼먹고 사회라는 버스에서 모르고 두고 내... 더 보기
평소 같았으면 그냥 우와 정말 유려하다하고 멀찍이 서서 엿보았을 테지만, 개인사의 부침과 새벽감성의 힘을 빌어 뭐라도 끄적이고 싶어 조심스레 괜한 댓글을 달아봅니다. 좋은 글에 때가 묻지 않았으면 좋겠어요.
지엽적이지만, 인상적이고 뭐라도 적어보고 싶었던 것은 권리에 대한 생각인데요. 저는 단순히 문장상의 의미로, 우리가 누리는 소위 권리라는 것이 숨쉬듯 당연하고, 현실에 고스란히 실체화되고 표창되어 있다는 것이 누구나 절절하게 깨달을 지경이길 바라요. 종국에는 권리 위에 잠자는 누구더라도 빼먹고 사회라는 버스에서 모르고 두고 내리지 않게요. 글쓴이께서 적으신 권리와는 조금 궤가 다르긴 한데요. 어쨌든, 모두가 체화해서 적어도 이성이 무엇인지에 대한 인간적 신뢰가 물리칠 수 없는 사실로 굳어졌으면 좋겠어요. 다소 이상적이고 일부 악화로 대다수 양화를 손쉽게 구축하는 세상에서 기적과도 같은 이야기겠지만, 세상이 엄마로 흔히 일컬어지는 자애상마냥 권리보장에 적극적이었으면 좋겠어요. 있는데 분명 있는데 없는 것마냥 버려진 아이같은 권리가 너무 많아요. 도처에 쉬이 보여요. 그럼 뭐라도 앞장서해보던가, 그랬음 좋겠는데 안타까워요.
온전한 개개인 간에도, 그나마 권리를, 그 수단일 법을 배웠다는 사람들간에도 무뎌지고 허섭한 권리의식이 있을진데, 사회라는 환경적 지각에서 기울어진 발판은 얼마나 위태롭고 어지러울까요.
글도 어지럽네요. 외로웠나봐요. 그냥 아무 의미없이 뭐라도 끄적이고 싶었어요. 편안한 밤 되세요.
지엽적이지만, 인상적이고 뭐라도 적어보고 싶었던 것은 권리에 대한 생각인데요. 저는 단순히 문장상의 의미로, 우리가 누리는 소위 권리라는 것이 숨쉬듯 당연하고, 현실에 고스란히 실체화되고 표창되어 있다는 것이 누구나 절절하게 깨달을 지경이길 바라요. 종국에는 권리 위에 잠자는 누구더라도 빼먹고 사회라는 버스에서 모르고 두고 내리지 않게요. 글쓴이께서 적으신 권리와는 조금 궤가 다르긴 한데요. 어쨌든, 모두가 체화해서 적어도 이성이 무엇인지에 대한 인간적 신뢰가 물리칠 수 없는 사실로 굳어졌으면 좋겠어요. 다소 이상적이고 일부 악화로 대다수 양화를 손쉽게 구축하는 세상에서 기적과도 같은 이야기겠지만, 세상이 엄마로 흔히 일컬어지는 자애상마냥 권리보장에 적극적이었으면 좋겠어요. 있는데 분명 있는데 없는 것마냥 버려진 아이같은 권리가 너무 많아요. 도처에 쉬이 보여요. 그럼 뭐라도 앞장서해보던가, 그랬음 좋겠는데 안타까워요.
온전한 개개인 간에도, 그나마 권리를, 그 수단일 법을 배웠다는 사람들간에도 무뎌지고 허섭한 권리의식이 있을진데, 사회라는 환경적 지각에서 기울어진 발판은 얼마나 위태롭고 어지러울까요.
글도 어지럽네요. 외로웠나봐요. 그냥 아무 의미없이 뭐라도 끄적이고 싶었어요. 편안한 밤 되세요.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
109670>
109670>
