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홍차넷
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티타임
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- 다양한 주제에 대해 자유롭게 글을 작성하는 게시판입니다.
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전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌방송/연예도서/문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제생활체육과학/기술철학/종교정치요리/음식역사여행육아/가정IT/컴퓨터음악창작게임스포츠사회오프모임
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 21/05/08 19:21:04 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 |
| Name | 私律 |
| Subject | 그냥 쓰는 이야기 |
|
홍차넷에서 제가 요즘 눈이 가는 분이 계십니다. 제가 아는 분은 아니고 그 분도 저를 모르실 겁니다만, 직장생활 얘기하시면서 가끔 아이 사진을 올리거나 아이 얘기를 하시더라구요. 얼마 전 그 분께서 올린 아이 뒷 모습 사진과 객지생활한다는 글을 보니, 그분처럼 직장생활을 하셨던 제 어머니와 그 아이 또래였던 제가 생각났습니다. 이런 저런 생각을 하다가 글을 쓰게 되네요. 제 어머니는 초등학교 교사셨습니다. 어머니는 40년대생이신데, 학교 다니기 쉽지 않은 시절이었다죠. '대학생 친구 하나'를 절규하던 전태일이 어머니보다 조금 어리니까요. 그 시절 딸로 태어난 어머니와 이모들께서 학교에 갈 수 있었던 것은 오로지 외할머니 덕이었습니다. 1920년생이신 외할머니는 책을 좋아하시는 분입니다. 공부도 무척 하고 싶어하셨다죠. 그런데 등하교길에 동네 개구쟁이들이 '아이스께끼'를 했답니다. 요즘은 그런 걸 못 보지만, 저 어릴 때만해도 꼬맹이들이 곧잘 하던 짓이었고 심각하게 받아들이는 분위기는 아니었습니다. 하지만 그걸 안 당신의 아버님께서는 '당장 학교 때려치우라'고 불호령을 하셨고, 더는 학교를 다니실 수 없었답니다. 듣기로는 일제시대-그 시절 분들 말로 왜정 때-다 보니, 딸이 돌아다니다가 언제 어디로 잡혀갈지 모른다는 걱정도 했던 모양입니다. 외가인지 외할머니 친정 근처였는지 일본군 병영이 있었는데, 일과시간이 끝난 왜놈들이 훈도시 차림으로 돌아다니면서 무슨 짓을 해도 어쩔 수 없었다죠? 외할머니께서는 학교를 얼마 못 다닌 것이 평생의 한이었고, 당신의 딸들에게는 그 한을 물려주고 싶지 않았던 모양입니다. 집안 모두가 딸들도 학교에 보내는 걸 반대했습니다만, 쌀계 계주 노릇을 하며 돈을 모아 딸들까지 학교를 보내셨습니다. 그 시절 일반적인 여자가 가질 수 있는 직장은 간호사-그 시절 표현으로는 간호부인가요?- 아니면 교사 뿐이었을 겁니다(요즘과 달리 직업으로서의 교사는 인기가 좋지 않았습니다). 큰이모께서는 고등학교를 마치고 대구(맞나 모르겠습니다)에 있는 간호대학으로 시험을 보러 갔답니다. 그런데 그만 물갈이 때문에 배탈이 나서 시험을 못 봤고, 큰이모에게 두 번의 기회는 주어지지 않았습니다. 어머니는 요즘 말로 전교에서 놀던 성적이셨는데, 다행히 기회를 놓치지 않았습니다. 등록금이 싼 교대를 갔습니다. 그리고 외할머니가 할 수 있었던 뒷바라지는 거기까지였답니다. 막내 이모는 고등학교까지만 다녔고, 대학입시를 볼 기회는 주어지지 않았답니다. 두어해 전인가? 백살이 된 외할머니께서 같이 할머니가 된 막내 이모에게 정말로 미안해하시더군요. 이모는 '나도 공부하기 싫었어'라고 얼버무렸습니다만... 얼굴을 보니 이모도 대학에 못 간게 한이 되었나봅니다. 그러니 나이 먹고 방통대를 마쳤겠죠. 그렇게 학교를 다닌 어머니께서는 평생을 교사로 사셨습니다. 저를 낳고 두어해쯤 쉰 다음, 외할머니/할머니 손에 차례로 저를 맡기고 직장에 다니셨죠. 저 어릴 땐 버스를 세번 갈아타면서 출근하셨다니 편하진 못했던 모양입니다. 저를 두고 처음 출근하시던 날, 제가 그렇게 울었더라죠. 어머니와 사이가 안좋았던 제 할머니께서도 그 날을 안타깝게 기억하셨으니, 어머니 마음이야 뭐.... 외할머니와 할머니께서 차례로 저를 봐주셨습니다만, 제가 국민학교 들어간 다음이었던가? 시골로 내려가셨습니다. 생각해보면 별 것도 아니었습니다. 겨우 낮에 저 혼자 둔 것 뿐이고, 저녁에는 가족이 모두 있었습니다. 정말 아무 것도 아니죠. 그래도 어머니 마음에는 그렇지 않았나봅니다. 명퇴하시면서 소감을 말씀하실 때, 저를 제대로 돌보지 못했다며 눈물을 흘리시더군요. 제가 기억나는 건, 집에 와서 혼자 점심 꺼내 먹고 연탄불 갈던 일입니다. 어머니께서는 낮에 아이 혼자 두신 것이 말도 못하게 안타까우셨던 모양입니다만, 저는 괜찮았어요. 처음엔 어머니가 없다는 것이 정말 싫었는데, 국민학교 2학년쯤 되니까 어머니가 있으면 되려 어색하더라구요. 얼마전 그분의 아이 사진과 지방으로 출퇴근하신다는 글을 보니 이런저런 생각이 났습니다. - 그 아들의 뒷모습과 제 어릴 적 모습이 조금 비슷하게 느껴지더라구요. '내 아이는 너처럼 못생기지 않았어!'라고 격분하실 지도 모르겠습니다만... 아, 저도 그 나이 때는 잘생겼었습니다. 똘똘했구요. - 매일 아침저녁으로 저를 보던 어머니 속도 저랬는데, 저 분은 어떨까. 그러고보니 어머니는 방학도 있었쟎아? - 우리 어머니도 저 양반 또래로 태어났더라면 로스쿨을 갔겠지? 그리고 아마 저 비슷한 삶을 살았겠지? - 저 사람을 부러워할 어머니, 어머니가 부러웠을 이모들. 학교 문턱도 못 밟아서 한글도 못 읽던 할머니는 외할머니를 부러워하셨지... - 이제는 내가 그 시절 어머니보다 나이가 많구나. 나보다 어렸던 그 시절 어머니... - 저분 아들은 나처럼 어머니 없는게 편하게 느끼지 않았으면 좋겠다. 정말로. 그냥 이런저런 생각이 많았습니다. 그 분 아이가 잘 컸으면 좋겠습니다. 만약 이 글이 회원저격이거나, 그게 아니라도 모르는 사람이 내 얘기하는 것이 마음에 들지 않으시면 말씀해주십시오. 바로 지우고 사과드리겠습니다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 6 |
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Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 577
Warning: Use of undefined constant grant_delete - assumed 'grant_delete' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 577
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 425
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 429
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_formmail - assumed 'use_formmail' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 599
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 599
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 614
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 616
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 620
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 640
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 644
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/cmt_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 6
Warning: Use of undefined constant file_name - assumed 'file_name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 28
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 65
156692 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
156692 class='vcm '>
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 70
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
156692'> 私律
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
21/05/08 20:00
156692>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
제가 이제 나갑니다. 마음에 들지 않으시면 말씀해주세요. 바로 지우겠습니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
156692>
156692>