Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 278
홍차넷
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 34
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 45
Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 47
Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 51
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 237
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 34
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 45
Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 47
Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 51
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 237
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 269
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 300
Warning: Use of undefined constant title - assumed 'title' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 16
티타임
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 21
Warning: Use of undefined constant header - assumed 'header' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 31
- 다양한 주제에 대해 자유롭게 글을 작성하는 게시판입니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_formmail - assumed 'use_formmail' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 519
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_category - assumed 'use_category' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/include/print_category.php on line 9
전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌방송/연예도서/문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제생활체육과학/기술철학/종교정치요리/음식역사여행육아/가정IT/컴퓨터음악창작게임스포츠사회오프모임
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/setup.php on line 29
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/setup.php on line 41
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 389
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 398
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant subject - assumed 'subject' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 402
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 403
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 405
Warning: Use of undefined constant total_comment - assumed 'total_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 406
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 2
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/memo_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 10
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_category - assumed 'use_category' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 40
| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 17/03/02 15:45:34 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 |
| Name | 매일이수수께끼상자 |
| Subject | 내 잘못이 늘어갈수록 |
|
얼마 전 딸아이를 씻기려고 욕실에 아이와 나란히 들어가고 있었다. 셋이서 놀다가 갑자기 마루에 혼자 남겨진 아들이 언제 나올 거냐고 물었다. 금방 나올 거니까 문이나 닫아라, 라고 말하고 난 목욕용 의자에 앉았다. 아들은 누나 뒤로 문을 밀었는데, 마침 딸아이는 아직 자기에게 높은 문지방을 조심스레 건너느라 손을 경첩 윗부분에 놓고 있었다. 당연히 아이가 자지러졌다. 다행히 아들 녀석이 문을 건성으로 닫아서 손가락은 무사했지만, 그걸 확인하기 전까지는 가슴이 쿵쾅쿵쾅 뛰었다. 얼른 손을 빼고 아이를 안아들고 놀란 아들녀석에게 소리를 빽 질렀다. “아빠가 문 닫을 때 살살 닫으라고 했어 안 했어!” 아들도 울음을 터트렸다. 그리고 울고 있는 딸아이도 다그쳤다. “넌 아빠가 문 사이에 손 집어넣지 말라고 몇 번을 얘기했어!” 아이의 울음이 커졌다. 나도 주저앉았다. 그리고 딸아이를 꼭 껴안았다. 우는 막내도 같이 안았다. “괜찮아? 우리 딸 괜찮아? 미안해. 아빠가 미안해.” 아이들이 더 서럽게 운다. 딸아이 손가락 통증이 좀 가라앉을 때까지 우리 셋은 그렇게 화장실 앞 바닥에 앉아 꼭 껴안고 한참을 있었다. 그 순간에 봤던 움푹 파인 아가의 둘째, 셋째 손가락의 이미지는 아직도 선명하고, 아침에 혼자 일어나 출근 준비를 하러 화장실에 우두커니 앉아 있노라면 그 손가락이 생생하게 떠올라 나도 모르게 ‘미안해.. 미안해..’를 중얼거린다. 어느 날은 밤에 자다가 새벽 네 시까지 울음을 그치지 않아 마루에 있던 유아용 침대에 둘째를 올려놓고 “너 도대체 나한테 왜 이러니? 나 그냥 잔다. 너 알아서 해”라고 하고 그냥 문을 닫고 방 안으로 들어간 일이 생각났다. 그때 버릇을 길러야 한다며, 아이 달래러 나간다는 아내도 못 나가게 해 아이는 어두운 마루에 혼자서 한참 앵앵 울다 잠들었다. 지금도 난 둘째와 같이 자는데, 갑자기 그날 일이 생각난 것이다. 그래서 눈을 감고 잠든 아들 쪽을 돌아보고 누워서 ‘미안해, 아빠가 미안해’하고 속삭였다. 그러자 잠든 줄 알았던 녀석이 눈을 반짝 뜨더니 혀가 매우 짧은 소리로 ‘머가 미안해요?’하고 물었다. 잠든 줄 알았던 녀석이 반응을 해서 놀랐고, 사과를 이해했다는 게 놀라웠고, 뭐가 미안한지 되물을 줄 안다는 게 놀라웠다. 보통 요만한 나이의 아이들이 보여주는 놀라움은 부모에게 ‘귀여움’이란 감정으로 변환되어 입력되기 때문에 난 자다가 말고 녀석을 들쳐 안고 볼을 쪽쪽 빨기 시작했다. 아들이 까르르 애기 웃음을 웃는다. 아내가 ‘안 자고 뭐하냐!’고 소리를 질러서 두 남정네는 다시 등을 바닥에 딱 붙였지만, 아들은 계속 궁금했다. ‘머가 미안해요?’ 그래서 ‘응, 아빠가 너 작은 애기였을 때 야단치고 마루에 혼자 재웠거든.’ 아들은 알아들었는지 못 알아들었는지 ‘지금은요?’하고 물었다. ‘지금은 그래서 아빠랑 같이 자잖아.’ 아들이 빙그레 웃고 내 팔을 꼭 껴안고 뽀뽀를 한다. 아빠는 또 미안했다. 독신주의로 한참을 살다가 나도 모르게 좋은 아빠가 되는 게 삶의 가장 큰 목표가 되었는데, 그게 영 쉽지가 않다. 대신 자식들을 향한 부모의 말에 ‘미안하다’가 시간의 흐름에 따라 농도 짙게 섞이는 이유가 이제야 이해의 싹을 돋우기 시작한다. 잔고 20만원인 상태에서 결혼하자고 졸라 승낙을 얻어낸 후 처음 아내를 집에 데려갔을 때, 아직도 그 출처를 알 수 없는 오천만원 돈을 우리 앞에 내놓으셨던 엄마도 ‘미안하다, 이것밖에 없어서’라고 했다. 여느 할머니 나이였던 엄마는 일을 하고 싶어도 할 수 없던, 전기세가 아까워 자식이 밤 늦게 퇴근할 때까지 아무런 불빛도 없이 집 안에 가만히 앉아만 계시던 미련한 노인네였다. 결혼식 날 신혼여행을 출발하는 며느리 손을 잡고서도, 20년이 넘은 삼촌 차를 얻어서 나한테 키를 주시면서도, 내게 업혀서 – 그땐 몰랐지만 - 마지막 병원행을 하시면서도 엄마의 대사는 ‘미안하다’였다. 그래서 그런지 의사가 마지막 인사를 하시라고 자리를 비켜줬을 때 내가 엄마 머리맡에서 할 수 있는 말도 수많은 미안해요들 뿐이었다. 아직 해드릴 게 더 있으니, 힘내요 엄마, 이런 말도 못했다. 그 마지막 인사가 고약하게 입에 붙어버렸다. 입관식 때 가볍디가벼운 엄마를 안고도, 엄마 유골을 차가운 납골당에 홀로 밀어 넣으면서도, 집에 돌아와서 4년을 엄마 없이 살아도, 그 말이 떨어지지를 않았다. 풀 대상이 없어졌으니, 이젠 그 죄책감 비스무레 한 것이 내 평생 짊어지고 가야할 짐이겠거니 했다. 부를 수 없는 노래들이 많아지고, 고개를 돌려야 하는 영화 장면들이 늘어나고, 읽을 수 없는 인터넷 ‘짤’들이 생겨났다. 그것 역시 내가 감내해야 할 짐이겠거니 했다. 아예 음악을 안 듣고, 영화는 눈요기 위주로 고르고, 인터넷 커뮤니티들도 조금씩 줄여나갔다. 나는 그런 것들을 누릴 자격이 없었다. 그럴 여건이 된다면, 그리고 이 미안함이 해소만 될 수 있다면, 나도 엄마가 자식들 기다리며 앉아 계셨던 그 어두움을 계속해서 마주하고만 싶었다. 어두움 속에 이 깊은 죄책감을 해소할 길이 있을 거라고 믿었다. 그러나 늘 그렇듯 해결의 실마리는 예상치 못한 곳에서 나온다. 내 아이를 향한 부모의 죄책감이 바로 그것이었다. 모두가 쌕쌕 잠들어 있는 아침, 고요한 화장실에서 어제 더 잘 해주지 못한 것이 떠올라 나도 모르게 미안하다는 소리가 나올 때, 난 내 이기적인 마음이 누군가를 이토록 순수하게 사랑할 수 있다는 사실에 놀란다. 아가들 어렸을 때 사진을 넘겨보다가 내 성숙치 못했던 모습들이 떠올라, 괜히 그 시절을 지나온 내 새끼들이 뭉클히 고마울 때, 난 you make me wanna be a better man라는 명대사의 깊은 맛을 본다. 그런 미안함이 4년 치 쌓였을 때, 난 엄마 마음에 나에 대한 원망이 하나도 없었으리라는 걸 ‘반짝’하고 깨달았다. 엄마는 엄마 나름의 사랑을 엄마 방식대로 더 주지 못했던 그냥 흔한 엄마였던 것이다. 더 사랑할 수 없어, 미안하다는 표현만 계속 가슴 속에 쌓아오던 그 흔한 부모상에서 한 걸음도 벗어나지 못했던 미련한 노인네, 엄마. 엄마의 그 사랑을 인정한다면, 내가 죄책감을 가질 필요가 없었다. 내가 그 죄책감을 갖는 건, 내 평생 받아온 엄마 사랑에 대한 모욕이었다. 내가 우리 아이들에게 그러하듯 말이다. 완벽한 사랑에 죄책감 같은 건 끼어들 여지가 없다. 언젠가 아내에게 사랑한다는 말, 그 이상의 말을 해주고 싶고, 그런 말을 언젠가 찾아내거나 만들어보고 싶다고 말한 적이 있다. 왜 난 그 말이 이미 우리 엄마 입에 붙어 있었다는 걸 몰랐을까. 나를 낳고 너무 신기해서 쳐다보느라 잠도 못 주무셨다던 엄마가, 사랑 외에는 자식들한테 미안하다는 말을 계속 할 이유가 없었는데, 왜 몰랐을까. 엄마는, 그 마지막 날 내가 했던 미안해, 라는 말이 사실 사랑해, 였다는 걸 알아들으셨을까. 나도 엄마 한 번도 원망한 적 없고, 한 번도 모자란 적 없었는데, 엄마는 내 마음 알고 계셨을까. 다음 세상에서 만난다면, 우리 미안하다 하지 말고 사랑한다고 말해요, 엄마. 그만한 말이 없드라구. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 34
|
|
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 185
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_comment - assumed 'use_comment' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 540
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 542
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 543
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 545
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 576
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 577
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 577
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 577
Warning: Use of undefined constant grant_delete - assumed 'grant_delete' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 577
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 425
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 429
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_formmail - assumed 'use_formmail' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 599
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 599
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 614
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 616
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 620
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 640
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 644
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/cmt_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 6
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 22
Warning: Use of undefined constant file_name - assumed 'file_name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 28
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 65
72411 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
72411 class='vcm '>
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 70
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
72411'> SCV
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
17/03/02 15:48
72411>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
무슨 댓글을 써야 할지 한참을 멍 하니 있었네요. 제가 어떤 심정이실지는, 아마 매수상님(?)도 이해하실거라고 생각합니다.
저도 아이 둘 키우는 아빠로서... 뭔가 울렁~ 하는게 있네요.
저도 아이들에게 미안하다, 사랑한다라는 말을 아끼지 않으려고 노력합니다. 아빠도 실수할 수도 있고 잘못할 수도 있는 사람이라는걸, 아이에게 인식시켜주고, 그렇지만 그래도 항상 너를 사랑한다, 라는걸 인식시켜 주고 싶었거든요. 그냥 미안해~ 하고 던지는게 아니고, "아빠가 이러이러 했어야 하는데 저러저러해서 이러이러하지 못했어. 아빠가 미안해... 더 보기
저도 아이 둘 키우는 아빠로서... 뭔가 울렁~ 하는게 있네요.
저도 아이들에게 미안하다, 사랑한다라는 말을 아끼지 않으려고 노력합니다. 아빠도 실수할 수도 있고 잘못할 수도 있는 사람이라는걸, 아이에게 인식시켜주고, 그렇지만 그래도 항상 너를 사랑한다, 라는걸 인식시켜 주고 싶었거든요. 그냥 미안해~ 하고 던지는게 아니고, "아빠가 이러이러 했어야 하는데 저러저러해서 이러이러하지 못했어. 아빠가 미안해... 더 보기
무슨 댓글을 써야 할지 한참을 멍 하니 있었네요. 제가 어떤 심정이실지는, 아마 매수상님(?)도 이해하실거라고 생각합니다.
저도 아이 둘 키우는 아빠로서... 뭔가 울렁~ 하는게 있네요.
저도 아이들에게 미안하다, 사랑한다라는 말을 아끼지 않으려고 노력합니다. 아빠도 실수할 수도 있고 잘못할 수도 있는 사람이라는걸, 아이에게 인식시켜주고, 그렇지만 그래도 항상 너를 사랑한다, 라는걸 인식시켜 주고 싶었거든요. 그냥 미안해~ 하고 던지는게 아니고, "아빠가 이러이러 했어야 하는데 저러저러해서 이러이러하지 못했어. 아빠가 미안해. 아빠가 실수했어. 다음엔 그러지 않을께"라고 이야기 하면, 아이가 100% 이해하지는 못하는 것 같아도 그래도 뉘앙스로 어떤 이야기인지 충분히 알더라고요.
가족끼리 감정표현 솔직히 하는게 참 어려운 일입니다. 특히 저희 부모님 세대와 저희 사이는요. 그래서 저와 저희 아이들 간에는 최대한 가감없이 감정을 표현하고 그에 대해서 기분이 어땠다, 이렇게 해야겠다 하지 말아야겠다 하는 것을 이야기 하려고 노력합니다. 아이들이 모르는 것 같아도, 두 돌 언저리만 되어도 정확하게 알고 느끼고 하더라고요. 표현이 서툴러서 그렇지......
저도 아이 둘 키우는 아빠로서... 뭔가 울렁~ 하는게 있네요.
저도 아이들에게 미안하다, 사랑한다라는 말을 아끼지 않으려고 노력합니다. 아빠도 실수할 수도 있고 잘못할 수도 있는 사람이라는걸, 아이에게 인식시켜주고, 그렇지만 그래도 항상 너를 사랑한다, 라는걸 인식시켜 주고 싶었거든요. 그냥 미안해~ 하고 던지는게 아니고, "아빠가 이러이러 했어야 하는데 저러저러해서 이러이러하지 못했어. 아빠가 미안해. 아빠가 실수했어. 다음엔 그러지 않을께"라고 이야기 하면, 아이가 100% 이해하지는 못하는 것 같아도 그래도 뉘앙스로 어떤 이야기인지 충분히 알더라고요.
가족끼리 감정표현 솔직히 하는게 참 어려운 일입니다. 특히 저희 부모님 세대와 저희 사이는요. 그래서 저와 저희 아이들 간에는 최대한 가감없이 감정을 표현하고 그에 대해서 기분이 어땠다, 이렇게 해야겠다 하지 말아야겠다 하는 것을 이야기 하려고 노력합니다. 아이들이 모르는 것 같아도, 두 돌 언저리만 되어도 정확하게 알고 느끼고 하더라고요. 표현이 서툴러서 그렇지......
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
72411>
72411>
