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홍차넷
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티타임
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- 다양한 주제에 대해 자유롭게 글을 작성하는 게시판입니다.
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전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌방송/연예도서/문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제생활체육과학/기술철학/종교정치요리/음식역사여행육아/가정IT/컴퓨터음악창작게임스포츠사회오프모임
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 16/01/15 00:14:00 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 |
| Name | nickyo |
| Subject | [조각글 11주차]잠수를 타고, 두절이 되어, 절단에 이르는. |
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[조각글 11주차 주제] 싫은 것과 외로움 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 휴대폰의 폴더를 연다. 문자메세지 함에는 새 문자가 없다. 문자메세지함 버튼의 은도금은 다 벗겨져 새하얀 속살이 드러나있다. 이젠 그 속살마저 내 손때를 타고 약간은 누르스름하다. 다시 한번 문자메세지 함의 버튼을 누른다. 딸깍이는 소리가 다른 버튼들보다 훨씬 나약하다. 불빛이라곤 휴대폰의 작은 액정만이 겨우 이 방안에 머물고, 내 희망도 딱 그 정도만이 밝혀져있다. 이부자락과 몸이 쓸리며 파르르 떤다. 옅은 호흡이 매트리스 옆으로 쏟아져도, 여전히 새 메세지는 돌아올 줄 모른다. 메세지 매니저라는 기능은 지난 천여건의 문자를 보관해준다. 이미 역사가 되어버린 천 건의 문자. 그 산더미 같은 무덤 앞에서 나는 지독히도 꼼꼼한 형사가 되어 이별의 증거를 수집한다. 때로는 사랑의 증거처럼 보였던 수많은 말들이 이제는 지옥보다 더 깊은 나락, 가장 밑바닥에 진창이는 땅에 구른듯이 남루하기 짝이없다. 하나 하나 겨우 글자를 주워담는다. 깜깜한 어둠이 내려앉은 밤. 희망은 점점 줄어들어야 하거늘 잊혀져버릴 그 말들을 겨우 주워담고나면 조금씩, 조금씩 마음의 구석진 곳에 희망은 또 다시 낑겨앉는다. 텅 빈 길다란 좌석에 아무도 앉지 않았건만 그녀는 유독 아주 약간의 무게만을 새초롬이 남긴다. 언제 내렸냐는 듯, 뻔뻔스럽게도 웃는 그녀의 표정이 차창에 비친다. 그러나 자리에는 누구도 앉아있지 않다. 이내 눈꺼풀은 무거워진다. 아직도 새 문자는 없다. 딸깍이는 숨소리가 더욱 희미해져간다. 어느새 침대는 체온을 잔뜩 품어 훈기가 돌고, 나는 그럼에도 추워 어쩔줄 몰라 이불을 부둥켜 안는다. 수십번을 넘게 읽었을 그녀의 말 어디에도 이별은 없고, 그러나 나는 이별을 해 버린채 자꾸만 떠나가는... 절단되어버린 우리의 베인 상처를 핥는다. 전화를 받지 않아 소리샘으로 연결됩니다. 전화를 받지 않아 소리샘으로 연결됩니다. 전화를 받지 않아... 애타는 그리움조차 부릴 수 없이, 하물며 그이의 생사조차 알 수도 없이, 하염없이 이어지지 않는 사람은 존재는 했던건지. 신기루처럼 사라져버린 이의 마지막 말을 겨우 건져낸다. 나도 좋았어요. 지독하기 짝이 없다. 나는 어쩌면 정신병에 걸렸을지도 몰라. 나는. 어쩌면. 이건. 다. 환상일거라고. 그러나 까만색은 글자고... 저 열한개의 숫자는 결국 누군가의 명의인것을. 눈을 감는다. 눈을 뜬다. 다시 마지막이라고 몇 번을 되뇌이며 새 문자함을 확인한다. 숫자는 0. 아무도 없다. 아무도 없는 텅 빈 방. 아무에게도 닿을 리 없는 마음. 아무도 바라보지 않을. 마지막 불빛은 자동으로 꺼져버리고, 나는 펼쳐진 휴대폰을 접기가 싫어 그대로 머리맡에 둔다. 이제는 딸깍이는 소리조차 잃어버려 침묵뿐이다. 싫은것으로, 싫어할 것으로. 그 이름 석 자와 핸드폰 번호 열한자리를 곱씹는다. 그저 한 번만 싫어한다 말해주길 바라며, 그저 한 번이라도 싫다 말하길 빌며 아침까지 기나긴 기도를 지새다 겨우, 잠든다. 지루하고 막막한 아침이 오기까지도, 이별은 일어나지 않았다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 1 이 게시판에 등록된 nickyo님의 최근 게시물
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28435 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
28435 class='vcm '>
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Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
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Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
28435'> 눈부심
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
16/01/15 11:01
28435>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
슬픔 T.T
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
28435>
28435>
