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홍차넷
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추천
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- 회원들이 추천해주신 좋은 글들을 따로 모아놓는 공간입니다.
- 추천글은 매주 자문단의 투표로 선정됩니다.
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전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌게임문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제체육/스포츠과학철학/종교정치/사회요리/음식역사여행IT/컴퓨터음악창작사진
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 20/05/08 13:37:36 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 |
| Name | 세인트 |
| File #1 | KakaoTalk_20200508_103214609_15.jpg (152.6 KB), Download : 18 |
| Subject | 출산과 육아 단상. |
 * 짤은 코로나 때문에 찾아뵙지 못하는 하민이의 할아버지 할머니를 위해 제 아내가 집에서 촬영한 어버이날 기념 사진. 탐라에 요전에 아이를 언제 어떻게 출산해야겠다고 결심을 하게 되었나요 이런 요지의 글을 여쭤보신 분이 계셨길래 단상처럼 제 경험을 끄적끄적 써 봅니다. 홍차넷에는 저보다 육아/출산 선배님들이 훨씬 많으십니다. 그냥 제 경우만 살짝 말씀드려 볼까 합니다. 저희 부부는 현재 아기가 하나 있습니다. 작년 11월 25일에 출산했고. 그래서 지금 5개월 보름 정도 되었어요. 사실 저는 크게 아이를 원하는 편은 아니었습니다. 원래 아기를 그닥 좋아하는 편도 아니었고 아내 건강 문제도 있고 해서 아이는 반쯤 포기하고 살았더랬죠. 양 가 어르신들이 손주가 없어서 압박이 심할 것은 자명했지만, 뭐 대충 둘러대면 되겠지 했습니다. 그리고 저 자신부터 좋은 아빠가 될 자격이 못 되는 사람이라고 생각했고, 재정적으로도 넉넉한 형편이 아니라고 생각했구요. 근데 아내가 아이를 갖고 싶어 하는 열망이 매우 강했습니다. 원래 건강했다가 가지기 어렵게 되서 그런지 몰라도 아기를 갖겠다는 생각이 매우 강했어요. 그래서 백방으로 노력하고 수술도 받고 그랬던 거구요. 몇 년간의 노력 끝에, 작년 3월에 임신이 마침내 성공했고, 그렇게 첫 아이를 제왕절개로 11월 말에 출산하게 되었습니다. 근데 전 아기를 낳기 전보다 낳은 직후부터 부부의 삶 자체가, 정말 삶 자체가 너무나도 극적으로 바뀐 것 같습니다. 위에도 언급했듯이, 저는 원래 아기를 좋아하지 않았습니다. 아기보다는 강아지 고양이를 훨씬 좋아하는 편이었고 (이건 사실 아내도 그랬어요 ㅋㅋ) 식당이나 공공장소에서 애기 울고 뛰어다니고 하면 막 짜증내고 인상쓰는 편이었거든요. 그리고 출산과 육아 아이키우기에 대한 준비도 거의 안 되어 있었고, 미리 공부하거나 알아본 것도 거의 없었고 큰 책임감 같은 걸 가진 사람은 더더욱 아니었어요 솔직히 진짜 그랬어요. 당장 제 부친께서 저를 극도로 과할 정도로 엄하게+험하게 키우셨기 때문에 늘 아이 키우고 싶지 않다 내가 조금이라도 내 부친 닮을까봐 그렇게 아이 키울까봐 싫다고 늘 이야기했었구요. 근데 정말 정말 정말 신기하게도 주변에 사람들이 말하는 것처럼 뭔가 대단한 자격과 책임감과 준비가 없어도 아기가 생기면 사람이 극적으로 바뀌게 되더군요. 저도 그렇고 제 아내는 더더욱 그렇구요. 저는 제가 주구장창 우는 아기에게 한 번도 짜증을 안 내고 달래고 할 거라고 상상도 못했고 자다가 아기 울음소리만 듣고도 벌떡 일어나서 아이 안고 어르고 달래는 일을 할 거라고 상상도 못했고 일이 너무 힘들고 때려치고 싶어도 아기 웃는 사진 한 번 보면 기운나서 또 일하게 될 거라곤 정말 상상도 못했거든요. 그렇게 좋아하던 와우도 미련없이 접게 되고 술담배도 거의 끊게 되고 할 거란 것도 상상도 못했어요. 우리 아기 뿐만이 아니라, 그냥 세상에 모든 아이들 아기들이 다 이쁘고 귀엽고 사랑스러워요. 밖에서 난리피고 떠들고 하는 아이들을 봐도 그저 다 이뻐보이기만 해요. (아 피시방 같은데서 쌍욕하는 이미 머리 굵어진 애들은 패스...ㅋㅋㅋㅋ) (아 근데 쓰고보니 아예 짜증을 안 내는 건 아닙니다. ㅋㅋㅋ) 아무튼, 제가 말씀드리고 싶은 건, 뭔가 대단한 사명감? 소명의심? 책임감? 준비된 자세? 그런 거 없어도 괜찮다는 이야기를 해 드리고 싶었어요. 물론 뉴스에 나오는 극단적으로 무책임한 부모들처럼 아이를 방치하거나 학대하거나 하면 안 되겠지만 그건 정말로 극단적인 사례라 뉴스에 나오는 거지 대부분의 우리들의 부모님들도, 우리 주변의 아이 키우는 엄마아빠들도 전부 뭔가 대단한 책임감과 준비성을 다 갖추고 아이를 맞이하는 게 아니잖아요? 내 아이가 좀 더 좋은 환경에서 좀 더 준비된 부모와 함께 있었으면 좋겠다는 게 아마 정상적인 모든 부모들의 마음이겠지만 역으로 그런 준비가 된 부모가 되어야 한다는 분위기가 알게 모르게 아이 키우기 꺼려지는 풍토에 한 몫을 하는게 아닌가 하는 생각도 들었어요. 남자분들 중에 군대 가신 분들 다들 그런 경험 해보셨잖아요. 처음 군대 훈련소 가거나 자대 배치 받은 날에 아 세상에 이런 곳에서 2년 반~1년 반을 어떻게 버티나 이제 하루 지났을 뿐인데 이런 생각 들다가도 막상 닥치면 또 어떻게든 지내지고 버텨지잖아요? 대부분의 사람들은 막상 닥치면 또 어떻게든 적응하고 지낼 수 있는 놀라운 힘이 있는 것 같아요. 그리고 결혼을 준비중이시거나 결혼을 하셨는데 아직 아이 가지기를 망설이시는 분들은 (처음부터 안 가지시겠다거나 비혼주의자이시거나 갖기 힘드신 분들한테 드리는 말씀이 아닙니다) 그래도 아이 낳아서 길러보시길 추천드려요. 저희 부부처럼 대출금에 허덕여도, 부부가 다 건강이 그닥 좋지 않아서 육아 할 때마다 골골거려도 정말 정말 정말 낳길 잘했다는 생각이 들어요. 정말 인생이 아름다워졌어요. 그러니까, 너무 부담 갖지 마시고, 일단 결혼하시고, 일단 낳아 보시라니까요? 헤헿. (약장수 톤) * Cascade님에 의해서 티타임 게시판으로부터 게시물 복사되었습니다 (2020-05-22 23:27) * 관리사유 : 추천게시판으로 복사합니다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 19
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Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 614
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 616
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 620
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 640
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 644
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/cmt_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 6
Warning: Use of undefined constant file_name - assumed 'file_name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 28
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 65
20257 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
20257 class='vcm '>
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 70
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
20257'> 2020禁유튜브
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
20/05/08 13:40
20257>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
우리 첫째도 저만했었는데..벌써 6살이 되서 악뮤의 오랜날 오랜밤 따라부르는 거 보면 참 신기합니다.
둘째는 맨날 아빠 저리가!! 이제 다시 와!! 이러고....ㅎㅎ
삶에 낙이 없는데 아이들이 유일한 낙이긴 하네요.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
2
둘째는 맨날 아빠 저리가!! 이제 다시 와!! 이러고....ㅎㅎ
삶에 낙이 없는데 아이들이 유일한 낙이긴 하네요.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
2
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