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홍차넷
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Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 47
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Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 34
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Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 269
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 300
Warning: Use of undefined constant title - assumed 'title' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 16
추천
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 21
Warning: Use of undefined constant header - assumed 'header' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 31
- 회원들이 추천해주신 좋은 글들을 따로 모아놓는 공간입니다.
- 추천글은 매주 자문단의 투표로 선정됩니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_formmail - assumed 'use_formmail' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 519
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_category - assumed 'use_category' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/include/print_category.php on line 9
전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌게임문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제체육/스포츠과학철학/종교정치/사회요리/음식역사여행IT/컴퓨터음악창작사진
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Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 2
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/memo_replace.php on line 3
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 19/10/21 23:40:35 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 수정됨 |
| Name | 멍청똑똑이 |
| Subject | 체온 가까이의 온도 |
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종일 양 쪽의 이해관계 가운데에서 시달리며, 내가 이혼법정의 변호사인지 개발자인지 알 수 없는 상태에 이를 즈음에 회의의 풍랑은 잦아들었다. 악필로 흘려 쓰며 잔뜩 메모한 회의록을 워드의 양식에 맞게 옮기며, 적절한 모양새의 어휘를 고른다. 서로의 욕심이 진하게 배인 단어들을 곱게 갈아내고 깎아내노라면 마음이 시끌벅적 해진다. 분명 회의가 끝났는데도 귓가에 앵앵대는 말들. 고개를 세차게 흔드는 것으로 정신을 차린다. 겨우 한 바닥의 이메일을 써내고 의자에 기대어 축 늘어진다. 내 덩치에 비해서는 작은 사무실 의자가 불쌍하리만큼 몸을 푹 쑤셔 넣는다. 이런 일을 하고 나면 코드는 한 줄도 제대로 나오지 않는다. 얼음이 다 녹은 아이스커피를 잔뜩 입에 머금고, 미지근해질 때까지 기다린다. 꿀꺽, 하고 식도가 아플 정도로 한 번에 삼킨다. 시끄러운 것들이 조금은 쓸려내려 가는 기분이다. 회사 일이 재밌는 점은 일을 하고 힘이 들어도 일은 있다는 점이다. 힘들면 쉬었다가 하라지만 쉬는 동안 일은 줄어들지 않는다. 수산시장에서 팔리지 않아 점점 눈빛이 바래가는 죽은 생선 같은 얼굴을 하고 늘 만지작 대던 코드를 따라 친다. 특별히 생각할 것이 없는 코드를 두들기다가, 문득 외롭다고 생각했다. 다른 사람은 어떨지 모르겠지만 나는 외로울 때면 온기를 찾는다. 따뜻한 음식보다는 따뜻하게 만질 수 있는 것이 좋다. 내가 주로 좋아하는 것은 보일러 바닥에 개어둔 따끈한 솜이불을 끌어안는 것이다. 덥혀진 두툼한 솜이불을 둘둘 말아 품에 끌어안고 새우등을 한 채 흰 벽지의 벽을 멍하니 보고 있으면, 시간이 아주 천천히 흐르는 것처럼 느껴지곤 한다. 아니, 생각이 느려지는 걸지도 모르겠다. 솜이불의 온도는 조금 따끈하다 싶다가도, 이내 체온과 닮은 온도에 가까워진다. 나는 체온이 좋다. 내가 하루에 가장 많이 만지는 것은 키보드일 것이다. 코드를 짤 때도, 글을 쓸 때도 내 손은 키보드를 만진다. 나는 키보드에도 가끔 체온 정도의 온도가 있으면 좋겠다는 생각을 한다. 그럼 좀 더울 수도 있겠지만. 하지만 이런 날에는 일을 하는 동안에 솜이불을 끌어안을 수는 없으니까. 그렇다고 아무나 가서 끌어안을 수도 없다. 내가 만질 수 있는 것 중에 키보드 만한 것도 없긴 하니까. 왜 사람은 자신의 온도에 만족하지 못하고 타인의 온도를 찾아서 서성일까. 타인의 온도를 찾지 못해 비슷한 거라도 끌어안고 싶어 할까. 예전에는 사람의 체온이 그립다는 말에 대체로 섹스를 떠올렸지만, 지금은 조금 다르게 느껴진다. 내가 나이를 먹어서 좀 덜 밝히게 된 걸 수도 있고. 어쨌거나, 사람은 제 몸의 온도만큼이나 따뜻한 것을 때때로 끌어안고, 만지고 싶어 지기 마련 아닐까 싶은 것이다. 어쩌면 그거야 말로, 고독은 어디에고 있다는 말을 잘 나타내 주는 게 아닐까 싶다. 내가 아닌 또 다른 사람의 삶을 느끼는 데에 손길에 닿는 온도만큼 진실한 것이 있을까. 그러나 우리는 훨씬 더 많은 시간을 차가운 것을 만지기 위해 살아간다. 그 차가운 것들은 무척 중요한 것들이지만, (이를테면 키보드처럼) 따스함을 빌릴 수는 없다. 일을 겨우 끝내고 나머지 공부를 시작한다. 10분짜리 강의를 이해하기 위해 두 시간 가까이 머리를 싸매며, 나의 외로움도 조금 옅어져 갔다. 잔뜩 시끄러웠던 것들이 가라앉고 난 뒤에 공허감은 다시 알쏭달쏭한 것들로 채워졌다. 공부를 마치고 집에 갈 준비를 하니, 외로움 대신 허기짐이 밀렸다. 뜨끈한 국밥 정도면, 외로움을 달래기엔 조금 과하지만 허기짐을 달래기엔 그 만한 것도 없다 싶었다. 모든 것이, 그럭저럭 견딜만하다는 점에서 더할 나위 없다고 생각했고, 딱 그만큼 국밥이 맛있었다. * Cascade님에 의해서 티타임 게시판으로부터 게시물 복사되었습니다 (2019-11-03 21:41) * 관리사유 : 추천게시판으로 복사합니다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 16
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Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 614
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 616
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 620
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 640
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 644
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/cmt_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 6
Warning: Use of undefined constant file_name - assumed 'file_name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 28
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 65
18823 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
18823 class='vcm '>
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 70
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
18823'> 자공진
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
19/10/21 23:52
18823>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
역시 한국인은 국밥이죠.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
3
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
3
18823>
18823>
