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홍차넷
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추천
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- 회원들이 추천해주신 좋은 글들을 따로 모아놓는 공간입니다.
- 추천글은 매주 자문단의 투표로 선정됩니다.
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전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌게임문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제체육/스포츠과학철학/종교정치/사회요리/음식역사여행IT/컴퓨터음악창작사진
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 16/10/24 20:17:25 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 수정됨 |
| Name | SCV |
| Subject | [한단설] For Sale : Baby shoes, never worn. |
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- [유산이래] 카톡에 떠오른 네 글자가 눈에 들어온 건, 오전 아홉시 십 칠분, 아침 미팅이 끝나고 담배 한 대를 피고 나서 자리에 앉아 방금 전에 들어온 클라이언트의 메일을 열었을 때였다. [긴급] 말머리가 붙어 온 클라이언트의 메일과 무미건조하게 카톡에 찍힌 개인적인 네 글자 중에 어떤게 더 중요한 것인지는 직장인들이라면 잘 알리라. 그러나 도저히 외면하기가 힘들었다. 메일을 닫고, 심호흡을 한 번 하고, 알람이 뜬 것 뿐이니 아직 읽은건 아니다. 생각하자. 내일 아침엔 상무님 보고가 있다. 오늘 저녁까지는 부장님 컨펌이 끝나야 한다. 막내가 하고 있는 파트 진척 사항도 오늘 오후 중으로는 체크가 완료되어야 한다. 내 파트 맡은 부분 처리하기도 바빠 드래프트도 못봤다. 대표님 보고는 내일 저녁이다. 내일 아침 상무님 보고가 퍼펙트하게 끝날리는 없다. 부장님 컨펌조차 밤을 샐 각오를 해야 하는데. 그러나 계산할 꺼리가 되지 못했다. 벌써 올해 세 번째, 그것도 네 명의 아이를 저 네 글자에 보냈다. 묻을 곳 조차 없어 가슴에 묻은 아이가 벌써 넷이다. - 부장님 저.. - '어, 이대리 왜?' - 저 집에 좀 일이 있어서.. - '무슨 일?' - 와이프가 많이 아프답니다. - '제수씨 임신한지 얼마 안됐잖아?' - 그게...... 휴.... 그렇게 됐답니다. 다행히 우리 부장님은 눈치와 사리가 어두운 사람은 아니었다. 내가 무슨 말을 하고 싶은건지 눈치를 챈 기세다. 하지만 그의 눈빛에 아주 잠깐 스쳐간 '왜 하필이면 지금이냐. 쯧' 하는, 뱉지 않은 말들은 어쩔 수가 없었다. 나라도 어쩔 수가 없었을 것이다. 그나마 '너만 애 낳냐' '와이프가 집에 혼자 있는 애가 왜 이리 유난이냐' 소리나 안들으면 다행이다. - '이 건 누구랑 했지?' - 재영이랑 같이 했습니다. 제 파트는 대충 마무리 되었습니다. - '대충?' 아차. 부장님의 말꼬리와 입꼬리, 그리고 눈꼬리가 살짝 올라갔다. 위험하다. - 지난번 검토하시고 말씀해주신 피드백까지는 반영해두었습니다. - '알았어. 믿고 가야지 어떻게 해. 파일 주고 가. 재영이꺼는 일단 내가 보고... 상무님 보고는 어떻게 하지?' - 상황 봐서 밤에 들어와서 정리하겠습니다. - '어렵더라도 그렇게 좀 해줘. 이대리 아니면 이 보고 힘들잖아. 부탁좀 하자. 재영아!' - '넵~~' 어렵사리 회사일을 짧게 마무리 하고 카톡을 열었다. 여전히 내가 읽지 않은 것으로 되어있지만, 내가 읽지 못했을거라고 생각하고 있을것 같진 않다. 답장을 찍는다. - [정리하고 있어. 어디야?] - ['A3 병원이야. 애들 둘 다 커서 처치 받아야 하는데 와서 싸인좀 해'] - [미안해. 빨리 갈게] 아내가 타자한 글자 중에 '애들' 이라는 글자에서 눈을 뗄 수가 없었다. 가지는 것도 너무나 힘들었고, 유지하는 것도 너무나 힘들었다. 하나를 보내고 다시 가지고 둘을 보내고 다시 가지고 셋째와 넷째를 한꺼번에 가졌다. 앞서 간 두 아이가 같이 사이좋게 손잡고 오는거라 생각하며 좋아했지만, 이제 셋째와 넷째 마져 보내야 한다. 행복아, 건강아. 택시를 타고 병원으로 향했다. 특별히 빠를 것 같진 않았지만 마음이 쉽게 진정되지 않아 발이 잘 떨어지지 않았다. 몸살기운은 없는데, 왜이럴까. 내 몸에서 일어나지도 않은 일 때문에 밀려온 상실감 때문일까. 꽤 비겁하네, 나는. 쓴웃음을 지었다. 사실상 수정과정에 관여하는 것 외에는 아이를 키우고 낳고 다시 키우는 것은 전적으로 아내의 희생에 달린 일이다. 그 희생마저도 허락되지 않는다는 기분이 들, 아내의 상실감을 손톱만큼도 알지 못하면서 나는 아이를 가슴에 묻는다는 둥 상실감이 든다는 둥 하고 있다. 구토감이 들었다. 멀미 때문인지, 혐오감 때문인지. - [왔어] - ['싸인 해'] 병원에서 만난 아내는 이미 환자복을 입고 있었다. 옆에 서 있던 간호사는 회색 클립보드에 얹은 종이와 볼펜을 똑딱거리며 내게 내밀었다. 수술동의서였다. 빠르게 훑고서 서명했다. - [괜찮아?] - ['........... '] - [아니 난....] - ['내일 회사 가?'] - [............] 서로 대답하지 못할 질문을 주고 받은 뒤, 아내는 수술실로 들어갔다. 나는 수술실 밖 등받이 없는 의자에 앉아 부장님에게 문자를 보냈다. ------------------ 오늘은 픽션 80%에 실화 20% 정도 되겠네요. 어떤게 실화고 픽션인지는 굳이 말씀드리지 않겠습니다. 사실 많은 부부들에게 낳지도 못하고 가슴에 묻은 아이들이 꽤 있을 걸로 압니다. 천진하게 노는 아이들을 보며, 매년 기일이 되면 절에 가서 태명을 걸고 안부를 전하는 아이들을 떠올립니다. 많은 부부들이 슬픔을 극복하고 살아갑니다. 가끔은 그 슬픔이 견딜 수 없을 만큼 크기도 하고, 또 그 큰 슬픔이 점점 작아지기도 하고, 다시 커지기도 합니다. 그 크고 작은 슬픔들을 안고 사는 많은 부부들에게, 별거 아닌 이 글을 바칩니다. * 수박이두통에게보린님에 의해서 티타임 게시판으로부터 게시물 복사되었습니다 (2016-11-07 09:42) * 관리사유 : 추천 게시판으로 복사합니다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 11
이 게시판에 등록된 SCV님의 최근 게시물
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Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 600
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 605
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 609
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 614
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 616
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 618
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 612
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 620
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 628
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 640
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 644
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 646
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/cmt_replace.php on line 3
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 6
Warning: Use of undefined constant file_name - assumed 'file_name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 28
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 65
6681 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
6681 class='vcm '>
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 70
Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
6681'> Toby
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
16/10/24 20:37
6681>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
픽션포함이라고 하셨지만 무거운 이야기네요.
유산은 저도 경험해 본 일이기는 합니다만 임신사실과 동시에 알게되었던 초기유산이라서 막상 아내만큼 크게 느끼지는 못했었습니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
유산은 저도 경험해 본 일이기는 합니다만 임신사실과 동시에 알게되었던 초기유산이라서 막상 아내만큼 크게 느끼지는 못했었습니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
6681>
6681>
