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홍차넷
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Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 45
Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 47
Warning: Use of undefined constant r - assumed 'r' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/outlogin_toby.php on line 51
Warning: Use of undefined constant memo - assumed 'memo' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 237
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Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 269
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질문
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- 질문 게시판입니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_formmail - assumed 'use_formmail' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 519
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_category - assumed 'use_category' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/include/print_category.php on line 9
전체기타게임진로연애가정/육아체육/스포츠교육의료/건강철학/종교IT/컴퓨터여행과학문화/예술법률홍차넷경제
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/setup.php on line 29
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Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/view.php on line 398
Warning: Use of undefined constant name - assumed 'name' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 2
Warning: Use of undefined constant HTTP_HOST - assumed 'HTTP_HOST' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/memo_replace.php on line 3
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 22/05/27 22:40:13 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 |
| Name | [익명] |
| Subject | 아버지가 한심해보일 지경입니다. |
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가정사를 최대한 요약해보자면 어머니가 교사라서 거의 자식들을 혼자 먹여살렸고 아버지는 수험생활 오래하다가 전문직이(세무,법무,노무,감평,회계,관세 그쪽 라인중 하나입니다.) 되셨지만 적성에 안맞아 돈을 거의 못버시는 케이스입니다... 저와 형은 둘다 서른근처라서 안정적인 직장에 취직한 입장이구요. 갈등의 원인도 간단하게 요약하면 아버지는 가부장적이지만 내향적인 경향이 있습니다. 어머니는 직업 특성상 외향적인 성향 어린 친구들을 항상 보다보니 트렌디한 부분이 있습니다 소득은 어머니가 아버지보다 항상 앞섰고 아버지가 수험생활하실때도 어머니가 거의 육아+돈벌이+뒷바라지 다하셨습니다 결과론적인 얘기지만 어머니는 집을 구매or분양받고 싶어하셨고 아버지는 항상 집값 떨어진다고 매매는 반대하셨는데 지금 시점에서는 집값의 엄청난 상승이 오면서 집안의 분위기는 그냥 사실상 별거상태입니다. 이미 5~10년전부터 사이가 안좋긴 했죠. 이런 갈등은 정말 결과론적이라고 생각하기때문에 어머니가 아빠한테 짜증내면 엄니한테도 뭐라하긴 합니다. 정말 집값이 오른다는 확신이 있었으면 아버지의 반대가 있든뭐든 했을텐데 그건 아니지않냐고... 이런 가정환경의 결과로 저는 '여자말은 일단 듣는게 낫다'라는 신념이 생겼고 결혼을 생각하고있는 여친이 이런점은 되게 높이사는점에서 좋아해야할지는 모르겠습니다만.. 제가 딸역할을 하면서 양쪽의 갈등을 봉합하고싶지만, 아버지가 너무 답답하고 한심해보입니다. 자존심 좀 내려놓고, 솔직히 예전이나 지금이나 어머니가 돈 더 많이 버시니까 아버지는 집안일 많이 하시면서 맞춰살면 됩니다. 그냥 이 문제에 대한 답안지는 너무 명확해요. 그거만하면 모두가 행복해질수 있는데 그거에 대해 거부를 하시니까 그냥 말로 표현할수없을정도로 너무x100 아버지가 한심하고 지금은 얼굴보기만해도 짜증나고 한심하다는 생각이 듭니다. 그깟 설거지 빨래 집청소 화장실청소 이게 뭐가 어려우시다고 거부하시는지... 가부장적이셔서 집안일도 잘 안하시고 아직도 서울의 집값은 폭락한다고 말씀하십니다. (박근혜정권 수준으로요) 물론 집값이 폭락할 가능성은 있다만, 밖에서 얘기 좀만 나눠보면 떨이지긴 떨어지되 서울 아파트는 예전수준으로 돌아간다는 답은 거의 없을겁니다. 이것 또한 아버지가 내향적이시기에 유튜브나 지인 등등 혼자만의 세계에 빠져계시고 터무니없는 의견들을 말한다고 생각합니다. 말을 해보면 논리적이라기보다는 대화가 안통한다는 느낌이 더 쌔게들구요. 지금은 거의 바지사장느낌으로 1주에 한번만 나가시면서 아침에 주식 단타하신다고 항상 책보면서 주식하시는데.. 반년동안 3천잃었다고 저한테 말씀하시는데 진짜 너무너무 화가 나더라구요. 그중에 2천은 지인이 오른다고 투자정보 줬는데 그거믿고 들어갔다 털리신거라 너무 흔한수법이라 그냥 한심x100입니다. 결국 아버지가 빈털털이되면 저랑 형이 아버지 노후준비 해야되는거라 제 돈이 털리는 느낌입니다. 그냥 뭐 안하시고 집에서 집안일만 하면 되는 정답지가 있는데 이걸 자존심때문에 안하고, 말해도 집값 폭락한다(이건 박근혜 정부때부터 들었습니다) 이런 얘기만 하고계시니 저랑 형을 너무 사랑해주시고 좋아해주셨지만 도저히 집에서 말을 섞기가 어려운 수준입니다. 그리고 이런 부분에 대해서 말씀을 드려봐도 고쳐지는 부분이 없고 정말 현실감각이 없으셔서 어렵습니다. 1. 2007년에 20년 장기전세 2억로 들어와서 전세 27년까진데, 집값 안떨어지면 어쩔꺼냐. 지금은 2억으로 비슷한 컨디션의 전세집 들어가려면 진짜 지방으로 내려가야한다 -> 그럼 오피스텔 살면 되지않냐 2. 주식 투자해보는건 좋은데 손절라인을 정하고 하셨으면 좋겠다. 계속 손실만 보는데 어떡할거냐 -> 전부 교육비다. 주식투자 책에서보면 저자들 전부 가족들한테 멸시당하고 살아왔다. 보란듯이 이런 시선을 전부 이기고 투자에 성공할것이다. 3. 서울에 집값은 그렇게 폭락안한다. -> 현재 젊은사람들이 돈벌어서 살만한 집값이 아니다. 무조건 60~80% 가까이 폭락한다.(저는 런던,파리,싱가폴,뉴욕 등의 대도시도 똑같이 젊은사람의 근로소득으로 집을 못산다고 말씀을 드려도 그냥 본인 주장만...) imf이후부터 쭉 집값은 우상향해왔고 통계를 보여드려도 결국 집값은 폭락(최소 60~70%이상)한다고 말씀하십니다... 예를들어 이런 발언들을 하십니다. 그냥 너무너무 답답해서 미칠거같고, 제가 어머니랑은 대화가 잘통하는데 아버지만 보이면 그냥 말섞기싫어서 방에 들어갑니다. 어머니는 아파트 분양때문에 스트레스 엄청받고 하시는데 아버지는 그냥 굉장히 편하신거같아요. 왜냐하면 어버이날때 제가 아버지랑 둘이 술한잔하면서 이런거에대해 말씀을 드렸는데 사실 꽉막힌벽에 얘기하는 기분이였거든요... 타협이 안되더라구요. 솔직히 어머니는 저까지 결혼하면 황혼이혼 하고싶어하는 분위기입니다. 어머니는 연금도 나오고 노후걱정없으시거든요. 아버지는 밑천도 없는데 '이혼하면 내가 벌어살면되지' 이런 마인드시고... 생각보다 밖에 혼자나가살면 힘든데 이걸 모르세요. 그리고 자식입장에서도 부모님 같이사는게 훨씬 좋은데 말이죠. 아... 사적으로 말을해도 어렵고 이미 어머님과 아버님은 감정적인 갈등이 쌓여서 대화도 안되고 자식과 아버지로써도 대화가 안통하고... 근데 자식의 입장에서, 아버지는 놓을수가 없고... 어떻게 해야할까요? 부부클리닉은 제가 말씀드려봤는데 어려울거같습니다. 이미 아버지랑 어머니는 끝난거같고... 자식과 아버지의 관계에서라도 뭐 도움을 받을수있는 방법이 있을까요? 저와 아버지와, 상담사 한분이 같이 3자로 말한다면 좀 묵힌 체증이 풀릴거같다는 느낌이 드네요. 이거조차도 안된다면 그냥 희망이 없다고 생각해야겠지만요... Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 0 |
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122788 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
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Warning: Use of undefined constant x - assumed 'x' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 71
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 76
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 117
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 118
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 119
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 120
Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
122788'> 나이스젠틀스위트
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 134
수정됨
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
22/05/27 23:02
122788>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
삭제합니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
122788>
122788>
