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홍차넷
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Warning: Use of undefined constant is_admin - assumed 'is_admin' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 269
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/zero_header.php on line 300
Warning: Use of undefined constant title - assumed 'title' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 16
티타임
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/bbs_title.php on line 21
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- 다양한 주제에 대해 자유롭게 글을 작성하는 게시판입니다.
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_formmail - assumed 'use_formmail' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/lib.php on line 519
Warning: Use of undefined constant use_category - assumed 'use_category' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/pb/include/print_category.php on line 9
전체기타일상/생각꿀팁/강좌방송/연예도서/문학영화의료/건강문화/예술경제생활체육과학/기술철학/종교정치요리/음식역사여행육아/가정IT/컴퓨터음악창작게임스포츠사회오프모임
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| Date |
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 53 18/09/09 10:28:16 Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 56 |
| Name | 파란아게하 |
| Subject | 고백합니다 |
|
질문게시판에 답변으로 쓰다가 자기고백이 되어 티타임에 올립니다. <<<제가 보기엔 질문자분께는 해야 할 이유, 명분, 목표, 합리화 이런 게 중요하지 않은 거 같은데요. 그냥 해야돼요. 명분을 찾아서 내가 그걸 반드시 해야 할 이유를 만들어줘, 이런 게 아니라 그냥 해야돼요. 나한테 지금 쓸데 없는 일이라도 상관없어요. 칼을 뽑았으면 무라도 써는 게 필요합니다. 아니 무를 왜 썰어, 그 시간에 다른 걸 하지?? 칼을 뽑았기 때문에 써는 겁니다. 시작했기 때문에 결과를 보는 거예요. 이유와 명분이 있으면 곧 실행하는 분도 계시겠지만, 질문자분은 아닐 것 같습니다.>>> 어떤 헬스장 문앞에 '운동할 때 가장 힘든 것이 헬스장에 오는 것입니다. 여러분은 방금 그 어려운 걸 해내셨습니다. 자 이제 쉬운 걸 해보겠습니다' 이런 게 써 있어요. 헬스장에 한 번 가려면 갖은 생각이 다 듭니다.(라고 들음) 처음엔 의지가 넘치는데, 몇 번 하고 힘들고 지쳐보고 나면 여러가지 핑계와 구실을 갖다 붙입니다. 하기 싫어도 실천에 옮긴 그 발걸음, 그게 그 사람에겐 그 우주에겐 진정 위대한 진보입니다. 제가 홍차넷에서 하는 쓸데없는 것 중에 탐라읽어주는남자라는 컨텐츠가 있습니다. 이게 굉장히 쓸데 없어요. 월요일부터 금요일까지 평일 아침이면, 한시간 정도 앉아서 녹음을 합니다. 듣는 사람도 많이 없어요. 근데 비가 와도 눈이 와도 합니다. 설날이고 어린이날이고 그냥 월화수목금에는 해요. 2017년 2월 6일에 시작했는데, 그만두지를 못했습니다. 딱히 관둘 이유가 없었거든요. 아직도 합니다. 그냥 하는 거예요. 아침일찍부터 스케쥴이 있으면 새벽 4시에도 녹음해서 올리고 나갑니다. 가끔 .... 내가 왜 이렇게까지 하고 있지 생각이 드는데요. 그냥 합니다. 처음엔 인기도 많았어요. 하루 청취수 100회 가까이도 됐고, 따봉도 하루에 30몇회는 우습게 찍었습니다. 기간이 좀 지나니까 사람들 관심도 시들해집니다. 처음엔 신기해서 들어보기도 하고, 많이 듣는다니까 분위기 따라서 듣기도 하고 그랬어요. 댓글도 1빠부터 10빠도 넘어갔습니다. 이젠 관심이 뚝 떨어져서 그냥 근근히 소소하게 하루 조회수 한자리, 따봉도 열몇분 받습니다. 박수칠 때 떠났으면 좋았으련만 그만둘 타이밍을 못 잡았어요. 그래도 이게 제 불규칙한 생활에 규칙성을 줍니다. 이걸 하기 위해서 일찍 자고 일찍 일어나고, 몸 건강을 유지하고, 목 건강을 챙기고, 평일엔 술을 안 마시고, 녹음할 때 바른 자세를 유지하려고 합니다. 작년 3월 31일에 목이 아프다는 녹음을 한 번 올린 적이 있는데 그 후로는 한번도 목 때문에 거른 적이 없습니다. 매일 한시간 씩 발성훈련이 되면서 목도 더 건강해진 거죠. 아무튼 습관 하나를 이렇게 만들어놓고 작년 5월부터는 '게임하는남자'라는 걸 또 시작했습니다. 이건 주말마다 게임을 녹화해서 올리는 건데요. 내가 아무리 바빠도, 일주일에 하루는 게임해야지. 뭐 그런 이유입니다. 참 쓸데 없어요. 이것도 관심없으시겠지만, 진짜 매주 올리고 있습니다. 이건 더 처참해요. 댓글도 안 달리고, 따봉도 한 자리입니다. 그래도 아직도 합니다. 오늘도 바쁜데 시간 쪼개서 올려야 합니다. 게임도 못 정했는데. 하아. 그 다음에 '여름맞이운동하는남자'라는 걸 시작해서 6월 30일 운동영상 업로드를 목표로 운동에 들어갔습니다. 이건 그냥 운동하는 거예요. 이걸 통해 원래 몸매도 늘씬했던 저는 더 건강해지고 더 늘씬튼튼한 좋은 몸이 되었습니다. 보이는 것보다 기능은 월등히 더 좋고요. 영상이 하루에 1만조회수를 넘게 찍은 건 덤. 다음에 뭔가 실험을 해보고 싶어졌습니다. 쓸데없는 데에 이렇게 공들이고 있으니 제가 해야될 공부에는 더 공들일 수 있지 않을까. '일본어배우는남자'라는 걸 올해 3월 8일에 시작했는데요. 어제자로 6개월이 됐고, 매일 쓰면서 공부를 해서 노트 세권을 채웠습니다. 이건 하루도 안 빼놓고 하고 있어요. nhk일본말첫걸음이라는 컨텐츠의 48과짜리 대본을 통째로 외웠습니다. 시작할 때 문법도 모르고 단어도 모르니까 그냥 통째로 외워서 썼어요. 이걸 공부하면서 유튜브에 수십개 올렸는데, 아무도 안 봅니다. 조회수 0인 것도 있고, 1인 것도 있고 그래요. 내가 공부하려고 올린 거라 이건 안 봐도 상관없습니다. 처음엔 계획도 못 세우고 뭘 어느기간에 어느만큼 공부해야 될지 감도 안 잡혔는데 이젠 계획이 잡히고 있습니다. 아직 초보지만 그래도 왕초보보단 나으니까 이제 테 형을 알고, 쿠다사이를 알고, 카라를 알고, 와따시와 아따라시이 파소콘가 호시이데쓰를 압니다. 한자에 음 따로 뜻 따로 있다는 걸 알고, 그래서 어휘 공부랑 문법공부를 따로 또 같이 해야겠다는 생각을 합니다. nhk일본말첫걸음을 거의 막바지가 되면서, 지역에서 주민들을 대상으로 하는 회화 수업을 듣고 있어요. 아줌마들이랑 듣는데 다들 저보다 잘하십니다. 그래도 궁극적으로 공부는 내 머리를 써야 하는 거고, 예습과 복습을 잘 하고 수업시간도 잘 따라가려면 잘 할 수 있게 되지 않겠나 싶습니다. 일본어를 잘 하게 될 수도 있고, 못 하게 될 수도 있습니다. 이건 내가 오늘, 내가 내일, 내가 모레, 어떻게 하느냐에 달렸습니다. 내가 하고, 하고, 하면 하는 사람이 되는 거고, 안 하고, 안 하고, 안 하면 안 하는 사람이 되는 거겠죠. 올해엔 이것과 별개로 2개의 과목을 정해 공부해서 3개의 자격증을 따뒀습니다. 제가 평생 공부를 이렇게 해본적이 없습니다. 어릴 때 학교 들어가서 시험을 봤는데 다 올백을 맞고, 그 다음 시험에도 다 올백을 맞고, 또 올백을 맞아서 그 학년도 제 평균이 100점이었어요. 그냥 문제를 잘 읽고, 차분하게 답을 쓰면 맞으니 저는 제가 천잰 줄 알았습니다. 그래서 그 뒤로 공부를 안 했어요. 공부를 해서 점수를 잘 맞으면 천재가 아니니깐. 노력을 하면 후진 거야. 뭔가 공부하는 걸 보이기도 싫고 쟤는 공부하는 애야 소리 너무 듣기 싫고 특별해야돼. 나는 놀아야돼. 놀아야 되니깐, 음악 많이 듣고, 영화 많이 보고, 운동하고, 춤도 추고, 연주도 하고, 연기도 하자. 근데 이제 나이가 먹고 나서 갑자기 뜬금없이 공부가 재밌어졌습니다. 쫌 자신이 생겼습니다. 꾸준히 차근차근 한다면 창조적인 분야 이외라면, 적어도 숙련이 필요한 분야는 어느 정도 수준에 오를 수 있겠구나. https://new.redtea.kr/?b=11&n=19&c=280 홍차넷 초창기에 홍차넷이 어떤 커뮤니티가 되면 좋을까 라는 논의에서 '정체성 찾기'에 대한 댓글을 쓴 적이 있습니다. 그때부터 홍차넷 하면서 계속 나라는 사람을 어떻게 보여줄 것인가, 그 보여줄 나는 어떻게 만들 것인가. 에 대한 고민을 한 시간이었던 듯 합니다. 그러니까 저에게 여러분은 매일 뭘 먹고 뭘 입고 무슨 고민을 하고 뭘 하고 놀까부터 시작해서 어떤 삶을 지향하는가 까지 솔직하게 보여주는 삶의 교과서이자 한편으로는 저에게 있어서는 예의 바른 관객이셨던 것입니다. 저는 이제 곧 에이징 커브를 찍을 겁니다. 절정기를 찍고 하강할 거예요. 몸도 예전같지 않을 거고, 노화도 올 겁니다. 그래서 제 몸이 잘 기능해주고 머리가 잘 돌아가는 지금까지는 뭔가 하나씩 잘골라서 성취해둬야겠단 생각이 들었습니다. 언제까지 절세미남이 아닐 겁니다. 언제까지 탐라읽어주는남자, 운동하는남자, 게임하는남자, 일본어배우는남자가 아닐 거예요. 저것들은 그저 제가 재밌게 열심히 잘 사는데 필요한 껍질일 뿐, 저는 그보다 더 안에 있죠. 본질적으로 나는 내가 뭔가 하려고 했을 때 할 수 있는 사람인가. 나이 먹더라도 내 안의 나는 젊은가. 늘 배울 수 있는가. 여전히 에너지 넘치고, 여유롭고, 유머러스할 수 있는가. 저한텐 그게 중요하네요. 제 습관이 만든 것 중에 근성이라 부를 것이 있다면 가장 최종적으로는 저를 창조적인 작업, 창작까지 끌어주기를 바랍니다. 처음엔 이런 글을 쓰려고 했던 것이 아닌데 의식이 이렇게 흘렀네요. 고백글입니다. 나는 나를 사 랑 한 다. 여러분도 여러분을 사랑해주세요. * 창작에 대한 저의 욕망이 녹아 있으므로, 카테고리는 창작으로 하겠습니다. Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 133 Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 146 Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view.php on line 161 82
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114445 class="iamcmt" style="display:none;"> Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 66
114445 class='vcm '>
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Warning: Use of undefined constant ismember - assumed 'ismember' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 121
114445'> 다람쥐
Warning: Use of undefined constant mod_date - assumed 'mod_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 133
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 140
Warning: Use of undefined constant reg_date - assumed 'reg_date' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 142
18/09/09 10:31
114445>삭제 주소복사
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 150
홍차넷 아이돌 파란아게하님 늘 함께해주세요!!!
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
2
Warning: Use of undefined constant level - assumed 'level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 158
Warning: Use of undefined constant password - assumed 'password' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 166
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 171
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 172
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant no - assumed 'no' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
Warning: Use of undefined constant vote - assumed 'vote' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /home/redtea/html/a_skin/bbsd/view_comment.php on line 173
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